Wow, the last time I posted something was over a month ago! My poor blog, I'm sorry I've neglected you. I told myself I would keep up with this and need to because a) it was something I've always wanted to do and 2) it's cheaper than therapy. (Lord knows I'm far from perfect, so really, why go vent to someone when I can write to all of those who won't read this?) I'm definitely feeling like a girl lately, where I just need to take a time out and sob hysterically, then suck it up and move on. Everything, and I mean everything, is getting to me. Major problem: I don't let people in. I may look ok on the outside and everything seems picture perfect, but I'm a pro at pretending. Listen, I know what you're thinking. It's ok. This is just me and I've always been this way. Even the closest people in my life don't know how I feel or what is going on inside my head half of the time. Flaw #1.
It drives me insane when people ask me what is wrong when I'm not smiling. Everyone is entitled to their bad days and just because I'm having one doesn't mean I want to talk about. Eventually I'll get over it. I'm sure you have your own way of dealing, right? I know that I'm my own worst enemy. I also think too much, and maybe I'm too in depth and passionate about things or people. Flaw #2
Music has always been my outlet, it helps heal my soul. I know I can always blast some tunes, sing at the top of my lungs, and escape in the lyrics and beats for a bit. Let's talk about stress, baby, let's talk about...how I told myself I wasn't going to sweat the little things anymore, or big things for that matter. Um, hello...still do. Life, love, and the pursuit of happiness is flat out frustrating. Stress and I have been BFFs for a very long time and I don't see us breaking up anytime soon. Flaw #3.
I've disappointed myself lately. I really need to get my ass in gear with my 30s list, like now. I've only crossed a couple things off so far and that's not ok. My head has been elsewhere and I need to refocus. I've lost sight of things. Flaw #4.
(Please note: I have many flaws, not just 4.)
Here's me, currently taking a step back and time to breathe, adjusting my lens, and taking another shot. Cause sometimes the first few aren't the best.
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